


one and the same

by avant



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-11
Updated: 2014-05-11
Packaged: 2018-01-24 08:43:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1598675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avant/pseuds/avant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky's not the only one who has nightmares.</p>
            </blockquote>





	one and the same

Bucky’s up first, he doesn’t think much about it as he makes his way to the kitchen to start coffee. Neither of them need it, Bucky’s been trained not to feel his exhaustion until he’s passed out, but Bucky likes the normality of it.

He’s waiting for it to brew when he hears the choked off scream and he’s racing back towards the bedroom before he can think. He’s never heard Steve make that sound before and it twists his gut with cold fear. Bucky’s expecting the worst, even the impossible. Zola or Pierce in their bedroom. Steve with a knife in his throat. His heart. He’s expecting blood.

There’s only Steve, his back to the door, curled up so tightly his vertebrae strain against his skin. Carefully, Bucky makes his way around to the other side of the bed. Steve’s still asleep, clinging to the sheets, face contorted in fear or pain or maybe both.

Nightmare.

He knew in a distant, logical way that Steve had nightmares. He’d been woken up by one in the past but Steve had already been waking up and apologizing and pulling him back to sleep. Bucky never had a chance to ask what about. He had never realized before they were this bad.

‘Please don’t kill me,’ he whispers and lightly touches his fingers to the back of Steve’s hand. He twitches but doesn’t wake up. ‘How do you wake me up?’ Bucky frowns and moves his hand up Steve’s arm, careful in case he lashes out. A pained noise escapes Steve but he seems to finally be relaxing. Bucky finds an odd scar on Steve’s upper arm and runs his thumb back and forth over it.

‘Bucky?’ His voice is scratchy and raw but he’s finally awake. ‘Fuck.’

‘That was bad Steve,’ Bucky whispers, moving to sit carefully on the edge of the bed, still touching.

‘Doesn’t happen that often. Not like yours.’ His eyes dart away and Bucky remembers a little boy not wanting to admit he’s hurt worse than he is.

‘Doesn’t matter.’ He doesn’t ask what it was about, though he wants to. Steve never asks him. They both have seen and done enough to feed nightmares for decades, Bucky doesn’t need to ask to know that. ‘Let me help.’

‘You woke me up,’ Steve’s eyes move back to his and his smile of relief is real. ‘More than enough Buck. And coffee?’

‘Yea, it’s started.’ He lets Steve push him out of bed and lead him to the kitchen. Bucky stands aside and lets Steve get the mugs down and pour for both of them. He can see in his face that he needs something to do. Something normal to keep his hands busy until the nightmare fades and he feels safely back in reality again. So Bucky sits at the counter and waits.

‘There.’ The strain around Steve’s eyes has faded when he puts the mug in front of Bucky, his own held in his other hand. ‘With mounds of sugar you creep.’

He grins as he takes a long sip. ‘You’re just jealous my tastebuds survived orphanage food.’

‘If they did I’m pretty sure that’s killing them all over again.’ He leans forward onto his elbows, sipping slowly at his coffee. Bucky watches, not sure what he’s looking for but needing Steve to be ok. Steve’s eyes are half closed, focused on his drink. Very carefully, Bucky takes it from his hands and sets it aside before leaning across the counter to kiss him softly. He can taste Steve’s bitter coffee on his lips.

After a second, Steve reacts, his hands twisting almost painfully in Bucky’s hair as he kisses back. Steve’s lips are rough and demanding and Bucky lets him take what he needs. It all feels strangely familiar, after a second he realizes it’s how Bucky kisses Steve after the worst of his own nightmares. The ones where he isn’t sure what’s real and what isn’t. 

Steve doesn’t let go when the kiss ends, just rests his forehead against Bucky’s and sucks in deep breaths.

He can see it in Steve’s posture as the tension starts to ease, his grip on Bucky loosens and he sags slightly. No longer fighting against himself. ‘My coffee’s gonna get cold,’ Bucky whispers, grinning when Steve snorts and shoves him slightly.

‘Asshole.’

‘You love my ass, you told it so last night.’

Steve finally laughs, shaking his head slightly as he goes to grab the coffee to top them both off. Bucky tries to hide his triumphant smile. He can do this, he can be there for Steve. ‘It is your best feature.’

‘You say the sweetest things.’ He reaches across just to touch, resting his flesh and blood fingers on the back of Steve’s hand. Letting him know he’s there. He’s safe. Steve turns his hand underneath Bucky’s so his fingers wrap loosely around his wrist.

‘Thank you.’

‘Of course. Love you loser.’

‘I’m gonna throw your ass out a window.’ But he leans over to kiss Bucky again.


End file.
